I almost didn’t make it to today’s show. I did end up making it with plenty of time, but my team is convinced that one of these days I am not going to make it because I have a little issue of keeping my car’s gas tank off ‘empty.’
I am like Kramer from Seinfeld. I feel the need to push it. I am not filling up that tank until it’s dangerous, until it’s – I’m told – bad for the engine. It’s something in me.
Someone on X posted that you are either one or the other: You’re either the person who has to refill your gas tank as soon as it gets below half a tank or you’re like me and Kramer. Unfortunately for my husband Doug, he’s in the other camp and gets very stressed out by my practice.
I got in my car this morning to take my little guy to school, and I see the gas tank says I’ve only got 14 miles left in the tank. I know his school is about 11 miles away, so I’m good. I’m fine. I can make it.
I figured I’d just go to the gas station at some point after. I didn’t bother to see whether it was within three miles of where the school was, but I know the dashboard lies. I don’t believe the dashboard or the fuel tank gauge.
So, we’re driving around and I’m like, ‘Thatcher, I’m down to seven miles.’ He asked how far away his school was. I guessed it was about seven miles. I overestimated because it was only down to two miles by the time I dropped him off at 8am.
I took a picture of the dashboard to send to poor Doug, which was really mean because it just drove up his agita. Thatcher’s last words to me – he’s 10 years old – were: “Good luck. You’re gonna need it.”
So, now the car said I’ve got two miles to get to the gas station. But I didn’t believe it. I know there’s a reserve in there that they’re not telling me about because they build it for people like me. I kept driving, and what came up on the gauge next was something I’ve never seen before.
It flatlined. There was literally a flatline next to the little gas pump.
The GPS said the nearest gas station was 11 miles away. I was on ‘E’ for a long time. But just like Kramer, I made it no problem. Look what happened. By 8:16am, I was refilled and had 454 miles to go. Boom.
In a lot of ways, it’s like going to the airport. Doug always says I’m not happy unless my lungs are burning when I sit down on the plane. Nailed it. Doug, meanwhile, brings like three books to read at the gate.
My system works perfectly, but he wants to go three hours early. God forbid we have the family with us or an international trip. You could bring a sleeping bag with the amount of time Doug wants to leave between us and the flight. He and Abby are the same in that regard.
All of this is to say, my producers Steve Krakauer and Canadian Debbie are very, very stressed out by my behavior. Debbie texted me that my gas tank is just like when I’m on the air and won’t wrap. “The dashboard is the problem,” she texted me. “It states ‘please refuel.’ For you, it needs to be ‘I’m serious. Refuel. Now.'”
I agree. The dash needs to say: MK, you’re not going to make it. Seriously. Right now, go.
You can check out Megyn’s full analysis by tuning in to episode 694 on YouTube, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you like to listen. And don’t forget that you can catch The Megyn Kelly Show live on SiriusXM’s Triumph (channel 111) weekdays from 12pm to 2pm ET.